I went out last night and met some friends at a pro-choice benefit. I alude to the cause of the benefit only to highlight my stance on the pro-choice/pro-life teetertotter. Yeah, I donated the five bucks I won off some well-meaning idiots who challenged me to pool. I met some new people. My friend toasted me because it is two days until the one year anniversary of my last drink of sweet, sweet booze.
Most of the girls wished me well and said that they were really impressed with me. There were also some mentions of how impressive this feat is.
This being 1:45 in the morning, most of the people at our booth were drunk.
This makes me wonder
1) Are they truly impressed?
2) Do they want to be sober also?
3) Do they think that it is pretty lame that I am at a bar sober near closing time?
I don't know, really.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Worst Flags of the World
For some reason the list of the Worst Flags of the World includes a lot of somewhat new Oceanic countries. I am not sure if that means I hate change or new ideas but I think their flags are gaudy, weird messes. I understand that they have a lack of outside historical sense. Most of these countries have never had the need to have themselves represented to the outside world. However, that means there is no excuse for bad flags. There are plenty of symbols that would put them in Top list like---whales, sharks, cannibalism, white/black sand beaches, palm trees, tropical fish. Use them, please! Also, I could not upload the Ukrainian flag properly but trust me there is really no need to see it. It's boring! I present the Worst Flags of the World.
SEYCHELLES
---Busy nonsense. Presumably a sunrise or sunset exploding over the horizon but this may be the new flag of the LBGTG.
ST. LUCIA
---Star date Jan. 15th 2008. On this voyage to St. Lucia we find that it has been taken over by a large group of trekkies and one day they hope to use this island as a launching point to start the new federation of planets. And this is their flag!
UKRAINE
---Not much to say about this flag. This two-tone flag is a boring, bad color piece of nothingness. Sorry Ukrainians but Blah!
VATICAN CITY
---I expected greater things out of the Papacy. After all it is one of the oldest, most influential little nothing nation to ever exist in history. The up/down two-tone just doesn't work. The yellow is ugly but the crest almost takes it out of the Ten Worst catagory. Could've done better Popes!
ZAMBIA
---Unfortunately it looks like a late-era Nazi Afrika Korps battle flag. I don't think that there is any lingering German influence in Zambia but it is sad that they took for inspiration such a checkered historical nightmare. That said, I don't care how it makes me look...the Nazi had some excellent imperialistic and heavy-handed cultural motifs for its flags.
BARBADOS
---This is apparently home to the sea god Neptune's new kingdom and this trident proves it. Great place to score mermaids, though.
CHILE
---Wow! The South American equivilent of Texas. This can only mean they think they are an autonomous entity within a larger political system hellbent on thinking that they are the best, the biggest, and the fattest people in the land (and everyone else is either fucked or stupid). I hate Texas and now I have to hate Chile.
KIRIBATI
---Obvious ocean theme, bad colors, wavy lines. Not the worst but does it inspire anything? Does it mean anything? Will that bird ever land?
MARSHALL ISLANDS
---I almost didn't include this in the Worst list because I think it may signify what could possibly be the worst thing to happen to this group of islands. Once a testing ground for A and H bombs, the island pays homage to the atomic future by crafting a flag depicting a nuclear blast or a apocalyptic, creepy, futuristic version of a bomb-happy world.
NEPAL
---The worst flag ever! No rectangular shape and bad coloring. Sorry Buddhists, I know this flag is very important to you but I much prefer the colorful prayer flags to this sawed-off ode to bad flagmaking...could be a lack of textiles but I have seen their extravagant clothing. No excuse...hands down WORST FLAG IN THE UNIVERSE
Next post---Best Flags of the World
SEYCHELLES---Busy nonsense. Presumably a sunrise or sunset exploding over the horizon but this may be the new flag of the LBGTG.
ST. LUCIA
---Star date Jan. 15th 2008. On this voyage to St. Lucia we find that it has been taken over by a large group of trekkies and one day they hope to use this island as a launching point to start the new federation of planets. And this is their flag!
UKRAINE
---Not much to say about this flag. This two-tone flag is a boring, bad color piece of nothingness. Sorry Ukrainians but Blah!
VATICAN CITY---I expected greater things out of the Papacy. After all it is one of the oldest, most influential little nothing nation to ever exist in history. The up/down two-tone just doesn't work. The yellow is ugly but the crest almost takes it out of the Ten Worst catagory. Could've done better Popes!
ZAMBIA---Unfortunately it looks like a late-era Nazi Afrika Korps battle flag. I don't think that there is any lingering German influence in Zambia but it is sad that they took for inspiration such a checkered historical nightmare. That said, I don't care how it makes me look...the Nazi had some excellent imperialistic and heavy-handed cultural motifs for its flags.
BARBADOS
---This is apparently home to the sea god Neptune's new kingdom and this trident proves it. Great place to score mermaids, though.
CHILE
---Wow! The South American equivilent of Texas. This can only mean they think they are an autonomous entity within a larger political system hellbent on thinking that they are the best, the biggest, and the fattest people in the land (and everyone else is either fucked or stupid). I hate Texas and now I have to hate Chile.
KIRIBATI
---Obvious ocean theme, bad colors, wavy lines. Not the worst but does it inspire anything? Does it mean anything? Will that bird ever land?
MARSHALL ISLANDS
---I almost didn't include this in the Worst list because I think it may signify what could possibly be the worst thing to happen to this group of islands. Once a testing ground for A and H bombs, the island pays homage to the atomic future by crafting a flag depicting a nuclear blast or a apocalyptic, creepy, futuristic version of a bomb-happy world.
NEPAL
---The worst flag ever! No rectangular shape and bad coloring. Sorry Buddhists, I know this flag is very important to you but I much prefer the colorful prayer flags to this sawed-off ode to bad flagmaking...could be a lack of textiles but I have seen their extravagant clothing. No excuse...hands down WORST FLAG IN THE UNIVERSE
Next post---Best Flags of the World
Ten Best Flags of the World
I love flags. There, I said it and I feel better already about it. As long as I can remember I have had an unbridled infatuation with flags. I have always loved to decipher their secrets, their meanings, their warring pretenses, and their claims of universal liberties and peace. Flags are perhaps the most important woven items in history. The have been used to navigate ships, identify nationalities, proclaim territories, signify team loyalty, and so much more. For some reason I wanted to examine my favorite and least favorite national flags. Since I spend way too much time analyzing and comparing them I thought I would offer up a Ten Best/Ten Worst list out of the two hundred or so flags of the world. While it is almost impossible to objectively look at flags for me without taking some political or historical fact into play I am doing this list hopefully strictly out of my feeble artistic sense. In other words whatever looks best to me and my personal art biases will be the ultimate deciding factor. As you will see there is no USA or Great Britain or any Western European countries. This is because of the preponderance of the boring three bar color scheme or the equally boring stripe theme. While these colors mean various wonderful things (liberty, equality, etc.) and there are some excellent flags (Ireland, Spain, Germany, Iceland, etc.), they don't really rank in either the best or worst so without further discussion on to the list.
THE PROUD BUT NOT THE BEST
10) LEBANON
---A simple and strange flag. When I think of Lebanon I can't help but think of Beruit under siege or scenes of multinational tourists sun-soaking in a seaside daze. I picked this flag because it makes me think of Christmas which most definitely is not the intention of the creator or followers of the flag. Nice tree, nice colors, simple, weird.
9)SRI LANKA
---A colorful and distinct flag. A little nod to their Indian neighbors to the north with two-bar color scheme in the left corner. Mostly I love the sword brandishing tiger and the four-pointed leaf display. A little regal and war mongering. Very cool.
8)SWAZILAND
---Obviously the motif is pure African. The Zulu shield also doubles as sort of a Rohrshach test. It has all the goods of pre-colonial Africa in its shield, spears, and tribal branding. Great color scheme and powerful, strong flag.
7) DOMINICA
---This Caribbean nation is represented by its green, yellow, and black colors. Always a good feeling color scheme. Who couldn't love a flag with its centerpiece a starry, circled parrot regally perched on a branch? Laid back, tropical coolness at its best.
6) ALBANIA
---In perhaps stark contrast to the Dominica flag, I love the Albanian flag for its simple, imperial double-headed eagle design. A bit dragon-like and Dark Age, this flag evokes strong feelings of small banded clans in constant historical struggle against its neighbors in a race for independence and freedom from subservience. Red and black is a great and powerful color combination.
FORMER SOVIET, MOSTLY ISLAMIC, ALL WORLD FLAG DESIGN
tie 5,4,3) TURKMENISTAN, KAZAKHSTAN, UZBEKISTAN
---These breakaway former Soviet republics have similar themes but vastly different flags. I love the Islamic crescent moon motif in any flag and two of these have that in different forms. All of these have really nice color schemes and unique, differing features. Could be excellent rugs or one could revel in loving a obscure culture and flags.
THE TWO BEASTS OF GREATNESS
2) BHUTAN
---This small Buddhist country smartly uses a dragon on their flag, sure to earn top honors on any list I would make. Even though the dragon appears to be teetering on apples in some strange balancing ritual I can't praise this cool flag enough. Most assuredly the orange and yellow color scheme will win me over anytime but when you add a mythical being into representation of actual people living in this age...truly wonderful!
1) UGANDA
---Quite simply, the greatest flag anyone has ever created. I love the twice repeated triple bar pattern. The colors are great and moving and nobody else uses this pattern in full. The reason this flag earns top billing is probably evident if you examine other flags in the top ten. It absolutely works when a country puts some sort of animal or mythical being in their flag. It changes the monotonous bar and stripe color boringness into something completely unique and eye-catching. So to the colorful and whimsical Ugandans (Idi Amin not withstanding) putting a ROOSTER (!) smack dab in the middle of your flag has earned you the NUMBER ONE FLAG IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE!
THE PROUD BUT NOT THE BEST
10) LEBANON
---A simple and strange flag. When I think of Lebanon I can't help but think of Beruit under siege or scenes of multinational tourists sun-soaking in a seaside daze. I picked this flag because it makes me think of Christmas which most definitely is not the intention of the creator or followers of the flag. Nice tree, nice colors, simple, weird.
9)SRI LANKA
---A colorful and distinct flag. A little nod to their Indian neighbors to the north with two-bar color scheme in the left corner. Mostly I love the sword brandishing tiger and the four-pointed leaf display. A little regal and war mongering. Very cool.
8)SWAZILAND
---Obviously the motif is pure African. The Zulu shield also doubles as sort of a Rohrshach test. It has all the goods of pre-colonial Africa in its shield, spears, and tribal branding. Great color scheme and powerful, strong flag.
7) DOMINICA
---This Caribbean nation is represented by its green, yellow, and black colors. Always a good feeling color scheme. Who couldn't love a flag with its centerpiece a starry, circled parrot regally perched on a branch? Laid back, tropical coolness at its best.
6) ALBANIA
---In perhaps stark contrast to the Dominica flag, I love the Albanian flag for its simple, imperial double-headed eagle design. A bit dragon-like and Dark Age, this flag evokes strong feelings of small banded clans in constant historical struggle against its neighbors in a race for independence and freedom from subservience. Red and black is a great and powerful color combination.
FORMER SOVIET, MOSTLY ISLAMIC, ALL WORLD FLAG DESIGN
tie 5,4,3) TURKMENISTAN, KAZAKHSTAN, UZBEKISTAN
---These breakaway former Soviet republics have similar themes but vastly different flags. I love the Islamic crescent moon motif in any flag and two of these have that in different forms. All of these have really nice color schemes and unique, differing features. Could be excellent rugs or one could revel in loving a obscure culture and flags.
THE TWO BEASTS OF GREATNESS
2) BHUTAN
---This small Buddhist country smartly uses a dragon on their flag, sure to earn top honors on any list I would make. Even though the dragon appears to be teetering on apples in some strange balancing ritual I can't praise this cool flag enough. Most assuredly the orange and yellow color scheme will win me over anytime but when you add a mythical being into representation of actual people living in this age...truly wonderful!
1) UGANDA
---Quite simply, the greatest flag anyone has ever created. I love the twice repeated triple bar pattern. The colors are great and moving and nobody else uses this pattern in full. The reason this flag earns top billing is probably evident if you examine other flags in the top ten. It absolutely works when a country puts some sort of animal or mythical being in their flag. It changes the monotonous bar and stripe color boringness into something completely unique and eye-catching. So to the colorful and whimsical Ugandans (Idi Amin not withstanding) putting a ROOSTER (!) smack dab in the middle of your flag has earned you the NUMBER ONE FLAG IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE!
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